The very last text message to me from Patrick was sent on January 6, 2016 and reads, “Go ski! Maybe that’s already your plan for the morning!” I was trying to recreate that day from memory, and I couldn’t. I must have driven CR into daycare and gone into my office for a few hours. I hope that I did go ski on the Nordic track in town before I headed home, but I can’t be sure. Chances are I didn’t go.

Springtime in the Rockies

That’s the way Patrick was—always encouraging me (and many others) to do the things I loved. I didn’t always listen to his advice. Like most mothers and caregivers I know, I put our young daughter’s and my sick husband’s needs before my own. I bristled at the encouragement because I had a “to do” list in my head that didn’t include time for myself. In training for a marathon, I feel I am finally heeding Patrick’s advice to just “GO!”

I’m three weeks into the training, and I wonder how I will ever get up to a marathon distance! I am still walk/jogging a 5k, and it feels like work. There was a time when running was effortless, but given the past few years of relative inactivity, my body is protesting, hamstrings and hips particularly. But, I am determined. I can hear Patrick saying, “What’s holding you back? You have everything you need to make this happen!”